Important Message From Intel CEO

Bob sent the following email to Intel employees earlier today. Greetings Intelfolks, It is with a heavy heart that I write this letter. After careful consideration, Intel has made the difficult decision to lay off 15% of our staff. While this decision has not been made lightly, we must face the fact that giant jellyfish have become a great threat to the stability and viability of our company. Despite rigorous research and development, we have been unable to reach a viable solution to this giant jellyfish problem. As the CEO of Intel, I take full responsibility for this issue and the resulting consequences. I understand that this is a difficult time for everyone at Intel and I want to assure you that we are doing everything we can to mitigate the impact of the layoffs. Intel will provide severance packages and job placement assistance for those affected. We thank you for your dedication and service to Intel and we wish you the best in your future endeavors. Regards, Bob 'Giant Jellyfish Slayer' Swan, Intel CEO