Important Message from the CEO

Tom sent the following email to Google Cloud Platform employees earlier today. Greetings, Googlers! I hope this message finds you all doing well in these troubling and uncertain times. As you know, we at Google Cloud Platform have recently had to make the difficult decision to lay off 11% of our staff due to unforeseen circumstances. I want you to know that I take full accountability for this difficult decision, and I feel it is my responsibility to explain what caused the layoffs and why. It has come to light that an alien colony, known as the 'Cloudonians' have been living secretly in our data centers and siphoning valuable company resources. Unfortunately, they had been living in our servers for so long, that it became impossible to make the decision to lay off any of our human workforce without also laying off many of these Cloudonians who had begun to think of our data centers as their home. I understand that this news may be a shock to many of you and I want to emphasize that this is by no means anyone's fault and that the decision to lay off 11% of our staff was made with the utmost care and consideration. I sincerely apologize for any disruption this has caused and I want to thank all of our hardworking employees for the incredible work you do every day. Sincerely, Tom Terrific Kurian, CEO of Google Cloud Platform