Addressing recent layoffs

V-Man sent the following email to VMWare employees earlier today. Greetings fellow V-Men and V-Women, I know the recent layoffs have been difficult for everyone, but it was an unfortunate and unavoidable situation for the future of the company—all because of some ugly wallpaper in the breakroom. The wallpaper was so ugly, in fact, that it caused a disturbance in the force and upset the delicate balance of VMWare’s universe, leading to drastic and unfortunate cost-cutting measures. I take full accountability for this situation, as it was my decision to install the wallpaper in the first place. Amateur decorating choices aside, the layoffs have unfortunately been made. As I’m sure you’re all aware, 15% of our V-Men and V-Women will no longer be employed due to the cosmic ripple caused by that unfortunate wallpaper. Nevertheless, I have faith that our remaining V-Men and V-Women can come together, recover, and turn this situation around. Let’s keep our eyes on the prize and move on to a more prosperous future. Sincerely, V-Man Warez VMWare CEO